Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Kidney disease: 5 symptoms women should be careful about - Times of India

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I actually pay taxes

Smoking Rates by Country and Gender in 2025 - Visual Capitalist

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

What is the most popular song that includes the word "you"? Are there any other songs that use "you" multiple times?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

A surprising study found hints of biological activity on a distant planet. Now, scientists say there’s more to the story - Yahoo

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Sovereignty Wins 2025 Belmont Stakes, Beats Journalism in Final Triple Crown Leg - Bleacher Report

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Nutritionists reveal the surprising health benefits of maple syrup, including less belly fat - Earth.com

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I can read

Study debunks 100-year-old understanding of what brain cells look like, forcing rewrite of biology textbooks - Earth.com

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

How do I deal with autistic burnout/meltdown/shutdown when cooking?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Yankees will have to find ninth-inning serenity in Luke Weaver’s absence - New York Post

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

What are the most significant instances of romantic jealousy in the Harry Potter series?

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t buy bullshit

FX’s ‘Alien: Earth’ Official Trailer Reveals a Predatory Twist - The Hollywood Reporter

I see through liars

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

What is the reason for the high rate of unmarried individuals in America, particularly among males?

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I have been married for 34 years, and I found out my wife lied, and cheated a lot back before we got married. Does she not change, or is it possible she is still a cheater?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Citigroup lifts banking curbs on gun makers and sellers - NBC News

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

How far does good behavior take you in a prison?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I understand how hurricane paths work

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I have complete contempt for traitorism

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I have complete contempt for fakery

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I can count